Oliphant

Apparently size consciousness begins nearly at birth. At just under six weeks old, Oliver already weighs well over 12lbs. Let’s just say he hasn’t had any consumption issues, nor has his mother had any production issues. Shipping direct to customer applying just-in-time delivery appears to be working well for this product.

He’s not chubbier than other babies, just big. And I mean BIG. We’re becoming self-conscious as he’s already wearing clothes that advertise themselves as 6 months and up. I reiterate…he’s just shy of six weeks today. However, I’m certain the problem lies in false advertising. Or, rather, it is an example of the cross-Atlantic cultural divide. We live in New York, a town heavily influenced by euro style (homeland of the metrosexual, afterall) and thus many of Oliver’s clothes are from the old world.

Also, orange is favored by both parents. But American baby boy clothes primarily come in pastel blues and greens, patterned with cartoonish depictions of trucks and miscellaneous sports paraphernalia. Conversely, Europeans, Italians in particular, appear to share our affinity for orange and shy away from the early advertising campaigns on their babies’ clothes. Further, while it is common knowledge that we Americans tend to be bigger than Europeans (Scandanavian cousins aside) and this plus-sized status is typically attributed to good old-fashioned American overeating, evidently the size issue is there even from an early age. So, our little Oliphant, our Baby Huie wears lots of burnt orange clothes meant for 6 month old European babies, but oh boyo does he look stylishly cute therein...